Dieser Beitrag wurde geschrieben von Nadine Meybauer

Relaxed settling-in at nursery & kindergarten: How to lovingly support your child through the first days

Nadine Meybauer

She is a trained children's yoga instructor, child and youth coach, as well as a certified systemic coach and counselor (St. Gallen).

The start of kindergarten or nursery is approaching – a great milestone for the whole family, when the child is cared for by someone else for the first time. An emotional moment, often accompanied by excitement, pride, but also worries. For the child, entering the daily nursery routine marks a new stage in their growth, and for mother and father it is often the first letting go – a phase in which many different feelings come into play.

Parents and children need time to get used to the new situation: for the children, a new caregiver, new rooms, new sounds. What tips help? When is the right time for settling in? Is my child ready for it?

A careful and gentle settling-in according to a suitable settling-in model is therefore highly recommended. Parents need trust in the professionals and the new environment, and the children must gradually get used to the new situation. A good bond and relationship with the new childcare worker is essential to ensure secure care.

How can I prepare my child for this change?

Important is: There is no universal recipe. Every child is different – but these general preparations can help with settling into the daycare or nursery:

  • Read and look at books about preschool, daycare, or nursery topics together early on

  • Integrate a cuddly toy into everyday life that also serves as support in the crib or daycare

  • Establish fixed rituals
    (e.g., breakfast, dressing, walking together to the facility)

  • Introduce other caregivers early so that the child learns that a good time can happen even without the parents and that mom and dad will always come back

  • Introduce positive beliefs:
    Depending on age, mindfulness exercises can help strengthen the child mentally, for example: I let go of negative thoughts or I look forward to the new day

  • Choosing materials together such as backpack, lunchbox, cuddly toy, or sun hat – this increases the anticipation for the new stage of life

How does settling in at a nursery or kindergarten take place?

A successful settling-in begins with a sensitive adjustment process tailored to the individual needs of your child. Step by step – from the first meeting to a secure separation – a stable foundation is created on which your child can start the new daily life with curiosity and trust.

The introductory conversation

This is where the individual settling-in plan is discussed: Which group, which childcare worker will accompany your child? In which time periods will the first approach take place, and when could the first separation occur? And: What special circumstances are there in your family? This conversation creates clarity and trust – also for the parents.

The Adjustment Period

In this phase, the child visits the facility together with a companion to become familiar with the rooms, routines, and people. The visits are gradually increased in length and intensity – adjusted to your child's reactions and pace. This is where the first bond with the new childcare worker is formed, which later is so important for a secure attachment in everyday daycare.

The first attempt at separation

When your child curiously accepts first offers and feels safe, the first separation attempt will be started – in close consultation. Important: The accompanying person says goodbye clearly and lovingly, explaining that they will come back soon. This helps build trust and gently introduces the child to being “alone.” If your child is still unsure, this step will be repeated – as long as it takes until they feel carefree and safe.

Further Procedure

Depending on the reaction, it will be decided how quickly the separation phases are increased. Step by step, lunch or the midday nap can then be integrated – until your child is fully settled in the nursery routine or daycare routine and feels stable and comfortable in the new relationship with the childcare worker.

Successful Completion

The settling-in period is considered complete when your child begins the day at the facility without fear and tears, has formed a stable bond, feels secure, and the parents leave with a good feeling. Especially the relationship with the educational staff is now a key element for your child's well-being.

What else can support the settling-in process?

Peace & stress-free time:

Plan consciously little else during these weeks so that you have enough space to fully focus on the settling-in period and your child

Do not introduce any further milestones:

Giving up the pacifier, changes in sleep routines, or potty training should better be postponed

Consciously shaping farewells:

A clear, brief parting and a familiar cuddly toy help your child to let go more easily

How long does the adjustment period last?

The duration varies from child to child. Some children are carefree on their way after just a few days, while others need several weeks. Give your child the time they need – and plan it firmly. Stress and time pressure easily pass on to your child – just like your feelings.

Conclusion: Loving, personal & patient – this is how a relaxed settling-in succeeds

Settling into the daycare or nursery is an important step in a child's growth – and for many parents a small emotional balancing act. With a well-coordinated settling-in plan, clear routines, and loving support, the start usually goes without tears and without worries. A stable relationship with the new caregiver is the key for your child to feel safe, build a strong bond, and for you to send them off with a good feeling for the day.

 
Nadine Meybauer
As a children's yoga teacher, child and youth coach, and certified systemic counselor from St. Gallen, Nadine loves creating new course content in beautiful natural settings. Her passion is to give children and their companions unforgettable experiences in nature that promote movement and inner balance.

Mehr Informationen über Nadine Meybauer findest du hier.

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