Dieser Beitrag wurde geschrieben von Nadine Meybauer

Relaxed settling-in at daycare & kindergarten: How to lovingly support your child through the first period

Nadine Meybauer

She is a certified children's yoga teacher, child and youth coach, as well as a certified systemic coach and consultant (St. Gallen).

Starting kindergarten or daycare is a big milestone for the whole family, as the child is cared for by someone else for the first time. It’s an emotional moment often filled with excitement, pride, but also worries. For the child, entering daycare life marks a new stage in their development, and for mom and dad, it’s often the first step toward independence—a phase full of many different feelings.

Parents and children need time to adjust to the new situation: for the children, a new caregiver, new surroundings, new sounds. What tips can help? When is the right time for the transition? Is my child ready for it?

A careful and gentle adjustment according to a suitable familiarization model is therefore highly recommended. Parents need to have trust in the professionals and the new environment, and the children must gradually get used to the new situation step by step. A good bond and relationship with the new educator is essential to ensure secure care.

How can I prepare my child for this transition?

Important: There is no one-size-fits-all solution. Every child is different – but these general preparations can help with settling into daycare or nursery:

  • Read and look at books about kindergarten, daycare, or nursery topics together early on

  • Integrate a Soft Toy into everyday life that also serves as support in the nursery or daycare

  • Establish fixed rituals
    (e.g., breakfast, getting dressed, walking to the facility together)

  • Introduce other caregivers early on so the child learns that a good time can happen even without the parents and that mom and dad will always come back

  • Introduce positive beliefs:
    Depending on the age, mindfulness exercises can help strengthen the child mentally, for example: I let go of negative thoughts or I look forward to the new day

  • Choosing materials together like backpack, lunchbox, soft toy, or sun hat – this increases the excitement for the new phase of life

How does the settling-in process in a nursery or kindergarten take place?

A successful settling-in process begins with a sensitive adjustment period tailored to your child's individual needs. Step by step – from the first introduction to a secure separation – a stable foundation is created, allowing your child to start the new daily routine with curiosity and confidence.

The introductory meeting

This is where the individual acclimation model is discussed: Which group, which educator will accompany your child? In which time frames will the initial approach take place, and when could the first separation occur? And: What special circumstances are there in your family? This conversation creates clarity and trust – also for the parents.

The acclimation phase

In this phase, the child visits the facility together with a companion to become familiar with the rooms, routines, and people. The visits are gradually increased in duration and intensity—adjusted to your child's reactions and pace. This is where the first relationship with the new educator is formed, which later becomes so important for a secure bond in everyday daycare life.

The first attempt at separation

When your child curiously accepts initial offers and feels secure, the first separation attempt will be started – in close consultation. Important: The accompanying person says goodbye clearly and lovingly, explaining that they will return soon. This helps build trust and gently introduces the child to being “alone.” If your child is still unsure, this step will be repeated – as many times as needed until they feel carefree and secure.

Next Steps

Depending on the reaction, it will be decided how quickly the separation phases are increased. Step by step, lunch or the afternoon nap can then be integrated – until your child is fully settled into the daycare routine or preschool routine and feels stable and comfortable in the new relationship with the educator.

Successful Completion

The settling-in period is considered complete when your child starts the day at the facility without fear or tears, has built a stable bond, feels secure, and the parents leave with a good feeling. Especially the relationship with the educational professionals is now a key element for your child's well-being.

What else can support the settling-in process?

Peace & stress-free time:

Plan consciously little else during these weeks so that you have enough space to fully focus on the adjustment period and your child

Do not introduce any further milestones:

Weaning off the pacifier, sleep schedule changes, or potty training should preferably be postponed

Consciously design farewells:

A clear, brief separation and a familiar Soft Toy help your child to let go more easily

How long does the adjustment period take?

The duration varies from child to child. Some children feel carefree after just a few days, while others need several weeks. Give your child the time they need – and plan for it carefully. Stress and time pressure can easily affect your child – just like your emotions.

Conclusion: Loving, personalized & patient – this is how a relaxed settling-in succeeds

Settling into the daycare or nursery is an important step in a child's development – and for many parents, a small emotional balancing act. With a well-coordinated settling-in model, clear rituals, and loving support, the start usually goes tear-free and worry-free. A stable relationship with the new caregiver is key to helping your child feel secure, build a strong bond, and for you to send them off with a good feeling for the day.

 
Nadine Meybauer
As a children's yoga teacher, child and youth coach, and certified systemic counselor from St. Gallen, Nadine loves creating new course content in beautiful natural settings. Her passion is to give children and their companions unforgettable experiences in nature that promote movement and inner balance.

Mehr Informationen über Nadine Meybauer findest du hier.

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